In another episode of the show we call A Singaporean’s Life, we eat, work, sleep, and maybe squeeze in some time to watch the latest Marvel movie. The most interesting part of our week is opening our PopMart boxes, or clicking into social media to find out with glee that Starbucks has a 1-for-1 deal.
The day in the life of a Singaporean is notoriously dull – or so we say. But how boring do things really get? We suss out the most boring things to do in Singapore apart from our nine-to-fives, to celebrate this collective experience of perceived monotony.
HR team if you’re here, I’m just kidding – lovin’ this job.
Image credit: Colourless Opinions
You go to your favourite prata house with your clique. Everyone orders a milo peng and egg prata. The conversation goes smoothly until an army bro brings up the NS talk and rambles on about “how siong army is”. The guys begin to rant, the girls nod and quietly ponder if things will get more interesting if they took a shot every time someone says “platoon”.
Let’s be real, army talk is good bonding chatter for the guys and a broken record for the girls. But no worries lads, at the end of the day, we’ll gladly listen to the ramble knowing that you’re working hard for the nation’s safety.
If queueing were a local Olympic sport, Singapore would surely win Gold. A lot of us aren’t the patient sort but we’d gladly spend a fraction of our day queueing up for our favourite ba chor mee. Don’t even get me started on the queues we see at popular restaurants on their launch weekend.
Approximately 30 minutes of our lives evaporate during this unstimulating activity as we slowly shuffle forward. Add on the fact that we soon take out our phones to start doom scrolling and you have an insipid line of human dominos. At least we’re happy dominos once we get our ba chor mee!
Image credit: Public Buses of Singapore
We all have that one friend who loves a long bus ride. Give them a journey that bounces from Pasir Ris to Orchard Road and back and they’ll have a field day staring out the window, watching the world go by.
If you’re up for this “boring” experience, here are some of the long and scenic bus rides in Singapore to try – Bus 36 runs on a 145-minute loop. You’ll be down a couple of hours of the day, but hey at least you spent no more than a nifty purple bill.
Apart from the fact that Justin Bieber chose Hailey over Selena, here’s something else that doesn’t make sense: prawning. Objectively speaking, nothing happens most of the time. Still, Singaporeans seem to love it enough that they’re willing to stay up till ungodly hours to fish for their uncooked supper.
If you’re a traveller entering Singapore and are curious to see how “boring” things really get, try visiting one of these late-night prawning spots. You won’t be disappointed, or maybe you’ll be.
Raise your hand if you had stayed up till the wee hours of the night to binge read celebrity gossip, or if you spent 2 hours watching XiaXue’s interview during the you-know-what drama.
We always complain about how the influencer drama in Singapore is “lame” but at this point, catching up on influencer gossip has become a national pastime. Admit it, as much as we claim “nobody cares”, we love listening to the tea. Kaypoh is in our blood.
We stan a good blog shop that feeds our incurable shopping addiction, but not so much that our friends ask “so … should I buy this?” for the gazillionth time. Yes Susan, this dress has pockets and no, you don’t already have something like this in your wardrobe.
At the end of the day though, nothing can stop us from embarking on another shopping trip with our besties – even if they can spend all of 2 hours browsing the same racks before walking out without buying anything, because, “Aiya, too expensive sia.”
Image credit: ZKang123
Fun activities overseas include jogging by scenic lakes, with rolling hills serving as the perfect backdrop. Here, a lot of us jog as well, but to catch the train.
A popular sport in its own right, sprinting across the platform at City Hall to get from the Green line to the Red is an activity the majority of the population has partaken in. Bugis MRT’s ultra-long connector between the Blue and Green lines, or Dhoby Ghaut’s escalator maze of are other popular “exercise” locations.
Certainly, it’s not the most exciting place to hit our daily workout goals but like they always say, it’s good to incorporate exercise into your daily life so this unofficial “shuttle run” is a win for HPB.
HLE can stand for many things – Healthy Life Expectancy if you’re into Economics, Higher Layer Entity if you’re into Computing, or HDB Loan Eligibility if you’re an average Singaporean of marriageable age.
Come the BTO launch dates in February, May, August, or November, the BTO-ready population can pull out their laptops and start keying in their personal particulars and their partner’s – again. Because no one really gets their BTO on the first try. Sometimes, not even the 10th.
Have you heard of the quiet game? How about the waiting game? Specifically, the one where the entire population waits for CNY for the return of McDonald’s twister fries. It’s a really fun game that we’ve all subconsciously subscribed to. Really. Who needs Exploding Kittens or UNO?
Comparable to Tinder swiping is the act of flicking left and right between food delivery apps. In the spirit of monotony, go through your folder of food delivery applications and find the best deal because cheaper is always better. Do the same the next time you need to book a transport ride as well.
While everyone else goes to Zouk or Marquee, the “boring” among us can go late-night cafe-hopping. You thought we were going to say watch Netflix at home? We’re not boring enough to have watched enough reality dating shows to come up with a list of them.
Cafe-hopping in Singapore at night is different from doing so during the day. During the day, people cafe-hop to try different kinds of coffee. At night, we bounce from cafe to cafe to avoid closing hours. Moving on to the next open establishment is our way of dragging out the pleasant night with our BFFs.
Alright, so maybe we are a boring bunch but sometimes it’s really about finding joy in the little things in life. Why live life in the “fast lane”, doing what everyone else defines as fun only to arrive home tired and unfulfilled?
If someone calls you boring, take it like a champ because you’re doing something that value adds to your life. Maybe toss back this study that boredom is good while you’re at it.
Originally published on 23rd March 2023.
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