Yes, it’s life in the big city – expensive, crowded, and hectic. Living in Singapore comes with its expectations – you’re expected to respect the art of seat-choping at a kopitiam, and trying to cut a queue will often get you lynched or stomped. But it’s not just society that expects you to behave – it’s also what your parents, uncles, aunties, and grandparents want you to achieve in your adult life. As times change, we may not have the same objectives in life as our parents did many years ago, but it’s still useful to keep some of these things in mind and work towards achieving them.
From the moment you begin primary school, you bear the full ambitions and aspirations of your parents. You’re expected to spend the next six years of your life working hard for the PSLE, and after that, the next two/four/six years working for the GCE examinations. Remember that even before your first day at school, your parents were spending their free afternoons putting in hours as traffic wardens and lollipop sellers to secure your place in this prestigious primary school. If you don’t remember this, don’t fret – your parents will be sure to remind you.
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For the lot of us who had just graduated with no direction, we often look at our peers with family businesses and think, they’re so lucky to have a route planned out ahead! But the grass is always greener on the other side, and sometimes they look back in envy at the freedom we enjoy. Which is better? We aren’t sure. But we do know that if your family happens to run a business, you’ll be strongly encouraged to kick start the long and arduous journey of inheriting it.
To your parents, getting married is a big deal. Many parents live in eternal fear of their son or daughter never falling in love and getting hitched. It’s the foundation of the next generation – the passing on of the family name. But of course, you can’t just marry anyone. Ideally, it should be someone who’s reasonably good-looking, filial, patient, caring, gentle, accommodating, knows how to cook and clean, and most importantly, gets along with them.
The things you dread hearing the most: BTO and HDB. So they can convert your bedroom into a storeroom. And make sure the fengshui is excellent. And you better not move too far ah, same SMC/GRC can already, so they can come for dinner and help you take care of your future children. On that note, any on the way yet? Speaking of HDB flats, they may not be landed properties, but they’re customisable all the same – check out our great ideas for renovating your new HDB flat.
Skipping this is worse than AWOLing from army camps. One gets you disciplinary action, the other gets you cold shoulders, black faces, and a guilt trip for a month. One thing that’s similar, though, is that you can expect several phone calls asking where you are and what your excuse is.
Although fuel prices are falling, that doesn’t make cars significantly more affordable. Still, you are generally expected to get a family car. Two-seater sports cars like the Audi R8 are totally out of the question. Large and spacious SUVs with comfy leather back seats are highly recommended.
It’s quite natural that your parents will have things they wanted to do that they couldn’t – represent the country in sports and events, make the newspaper headlines, become a celebrity. What do they do then? They expected you to get it done, of course. And if you couldn’t, maybe the next generation can help! We’re dreading the day when we hear this conversation – “When are you going to have children? We wait very long to hold our grandchildren already leh.”
If your parents are a bit more subtle, you’ll start getting the hint when they start bringing ginseng, oysters and abalone over every other week.
This way, we can hold the kids while you plan the itineraries for a 10-day cross-country tour in a faraway land. It really doesn’t matter that the hotel isn’t five-star and the flight isn’t business class, so long as the family gets to spend some time together. In fact, we at the Smart Local would go one step further and encourage you to try something adventurous! Check out this awesome list of alternative vacation ideas, where the whole family can try yoga, pilates, surfing, and cooking.
One day, your parents will get sick of you lazing at home and playing Maple Story during the long December holidays, and they’ll nag you to ‘get a job and stop wasting your life’. Exactly what I’m doing now, Mum. The unmentioned upside, of course, is that they don’t have to continue funneling money into your secondary school RipCurl wallet and hugeass pencil cases.
Of all the expectations, this is probably the most satisfying to fulfill. Your folks have supported you all your life. They’ve provided for all things big and small, from your diapers or your pokemon card collection, your first laptop to nearly 20 years worth of school fees and pocket money. With all these hefty expenses, you shudder at the thought of having a kid. Heck, by the time I’m done providing for them, how am I going to have enough for old age? As you enjoy your youth, your parents only get older.
Now that they’ve stopped working, it’s about time you do the same. Take the opportunity to find out about their retirement plans, and tips on financing all the needs and wants of your future kid. We can’t imagine how much an iPhone will cost 10, 20 years down the road.
As soon as you enter the workforce and take on your first job, the joy of finally self-sufficient sets in, as do the pressures of adulthood. You wonder if you’ll have enough to see these things through, raising kids of your own and retiring sustainably. Heck, how did your parents even do it?!
There’s only one way to find out – talk to them. Together, you can plan for the golden age that they deserve. Huge dollar figures and complexities can be tough to approach, but the big R chat isn’t always daunting:
The CPF Big R Chat is a campaign that gets Singaporeans talking about retirement and sharing their plans for the future. For those who are completely clueless, the website contains helpful insights and pointers to get the ball rolling!
This post was brought to you by the Central Provident Fund Board
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